Penis Envy

You know what they say about guy's with big feet?
They wear big shoes!

Mine is hot like the tropics,
Yours is microscopic.
Mine is a sausage buffet,
Yours is a yeasty vajayjay.
Mine sold out Madison Square,
Yours got crusty pubic hair
Mine makes your Mom go wild,
Yours molested a child.
Mine hangs down past my knees,
Yours picks chicks up at Chuck E. Cheese
Mine has it's own zip code,
Your's got stachybotrys mold.

Mine won the Superbowl,
Yours is the size of a tadpole
Mine is an Anaconda,
Yours is old like Jane Fonda

This pecker, this dick, this prick,
All the fellas are jealous of this joystick
Let me help you out and give you a clue
Watch me whip it out and prove it to you
This junk, this wang, this schlong,
All the ladies want a taste of this ding dong.
You only wish you were endowed like me.
Obviously you have penis envy.

Heard you talking shit
Like a jealous little bitch
Time for me to unzip
So you can come suck it

Mine has lines down the block,
Yours makes love to a sock.
Mine goes from here to Japan,
Yours is stuck in Munchkinland.
Mine gets all kinds of head,
Yours just wets the bed.
Mine is grade A beef,
Yours a vegan lettuce leaf.
Mine makes the ladies go crazy,
Yours is covered in scabies.
Mine gives rides like a pony,
Yours is tiny like macaroni,
Mine makes the bitches scream,
Yours needs Vagisil cream.
Mine makes the guys go gay,
Yours makes the girls run away.

Mine is world famous,
Yours just smells like anus.
Mine is a porno star,
Yours is a bitesize Twix bar.

This Johnson, this member, this pants snake,
All the guys are jealous of this tube stake.
Come and see if you don't believe me.
Watch me unzip and free this willy.
This junk, this wang, this schlong,
All the ladies want a taste of this ding dong.
You only wish you were endowed like me.
Obviously you have penis envy.

Heard you talking shit
Like a scared little bitch
More chicken than a bucket
So you can come and suck it.

Mine bangs all the bitches,
Yours just washes the dishes.
Mine keeps the chicks cumming,
Yours keeps the chicks running.
Mine is a cunt wrecker
Yours is the size of a chili pepper
Mine destroys the vag,
Yours was touched by your dad.

This pecker, this dick, this prick,
All the fellas are jealous of this joystick.
Let me help you out and give you a clue,
Watch me whip it out and prove it to you
This Johnson, this member, this pants snake,
All the guys are jealous of this tube stake.
Come and see if you don't believe me.
Watch me unzip and free this willy.
This junk, this wang, this schlong,
All the ladies want a taste of this ding dong.
You only wish you were endowed as me.
Obviously you have penis envy.

Heard you talking shit
Like a jealous little Bitch
Time for me to unzip
So you can come suck it.

Suck it, bitch

Suck it, bitch